when is it really over

sa pangangalikot ko ng net nabasa ko to.. at nakakatuwa nmang basahin..


This is one of the mornings after another sleepless night that I
cannot help not ask myself, why didn't I have a good night sleep again? Then
Iwould just joke myself and answer it with, maybe someone's been
thinking of me all night....hahaha!

Jokes are always half-meant, a friend said once. And maybe...just
maybe, behind that joke, there's this wishful thinking that someone has
really been thinking of me. Then the memory of someone from the past
would, again, bounce in my head...disturb my sanity and make my day
half-miserable.

What if he's thinking about me? What if he still loves me? It's
just another imagination, I know. Another day of what if's and maybe's.

For the nth time, I've told myself that when it's over, it's really over!
There's no sense turning back or even trying to pick up the pieces
again. It's time to move on and face the reality!

When it's over, is it really over? When you decide to let go, do you
really succeed in letting go? I just heard the latest song of Sugar
Ray a while ago. Here's the few lines that caught my attention:

When it's over, That's the time I fall in love again... When it's
over, That's the time you're in my heart again...

How can you possibly say it's over when you're still in love with the
person you said you were over with already? I guess it's not that
easy when the chain of the past locks you in the chest of false hopes and
leads you to a place called fantasy with Cinderella and Snow White as your
best friends! The three of you would gather on the hilltop and after a
while three young drop-dead gorgeous princes would come riding on their
horses to join the picnic under a tree.

How pathetic! But, admit it or not, it's true... The hardest part of
losing a loved one is to accept the fact that they're gone and might
never come back again. There are things that will always remind you of your
togetherness...the places you've been, his or her favorite food you
used to cook for him or her, expressions you used to hear ; from him or her
and songs you've both loved to sing.

These are the memories that'd linger on your mind from time to time.
Because you were both in love before (or so you think), it makes
you hope for another chance. You begin to believe on what others said
that love is lovelier the second time around and the line from Ally
McBeal, "whoever said that 'plenty of fish in the sea' thing is lying.
Sometimes, there's only one...trust me."

We would desperately believe that what happens in the movies might also
happen to us one day. Who didn't like the lines from the movie "Runaway Bride" where Julia
Roberts told Richard Gere, "I guarantee that we'll have tough time; I
guarantee that in some point, one of us would want to get out; I also
guarantee that if I don't ask you to be mine, I'll regret this for the
rest of my life, 'coz I know in my heart...you're the only one for me."

We tend to think that the person who left us will come back one day
and say those words, or just simple words but would promise forever.
Problems may occur every now and then, but we would consider those
things as trials to be conquered in order for the relationship to bloom and
mature.

Oouucchh! Reality just bit me!

More often than not, these romantic movies and mushy love songs only
make us long for something we cannot have...and for someone who cannot be
ours again. It hurts to admit that we are just pretending. All the while,
we already knew the truth but we ignore it. When the damage is done,
there's nothing left to do but cry...to mourn for the bitterness in our hearts.
Then curse anybody who gets in the way.

I'm scared!!!

As long as we still hold on to the past, the chance of meeting someone
new may be a bit far off the field.

The fear of trusting and falling in love again may also hinder us to
grow and move on. We are hesitant to take the risk, afraid that we may
get hurt again. Because of the negative thoughts stocked in our brains,
we refuse to go out from our self-made world and deprive ourselves from new
opportunities, whether in love affairs or career wise.

Let's face it! Betrayal can be anywhere and anyone can be a victim.
The worst part is when the one we truly, madly and deeply love is the one who
will betray us in the end. Then we are left with nothing but a broken
heart and wounded pride. Sad... but true.

Reality check please...

It can happen to anyone but we shouldn't just take things as it
comes. An action must be done. We should take care of ourselves from the
hungry wolves in the jungle. It's just a matter of survival. Stand up when
you fall. It's okay to cry as hard and as long as you want to, just make
sure that when you stop crying, you won't cry for the same reason
anymore.

Learn and live. Love is the most wonderful thing one can offer, so be
smart enough to give the love in your heart to the one who really
deserves.

- mac